So the author’s use of space… is awkward. Each and every scene seems to occur in a vacuum, only the briefest attention given to the details of the location. Settings become rough layouts of rooms with noticeable obstacles. The fine details that we would expect our narrator to present to us through the magnificently observant eyes of young Ender Wiggan don’t occur.

It is possible the author intentionally left the settings sparse for mood and out of logical reason; space is cold and empty, extra clutter is dangerous and Ender lives in a cold and empty world. But that’s cheating.

Ender is not cold and empty, thus even though the world he lives in might be immaculate or sparse, Ender’s perceptions should have colored it a multitude of hues, from a tiny spittle of rust on a seldom used access hatch, to a flicker or twitch in the eyes of his arch-nemesis, Bonzo.

Further, Ender’s insight came from nowhere. The more I ponder this the more troubling it becomes. The character saved the world – but how? His magical intellect grew from what seem to be two very average parents. In the beginning of the book, some pretense is made towards the monitoring and selection of special children. This is fine in the beginning, but as the world’s hopes come to rest squarely on Ender, his abilities outstrip even the most senior of military commanders. As readers we need more. We need some assurance of plausibility; some reason that this is all possible. The author fails to deliver.

One of the Fiction Department’s more fun methods is “story within a story.” It’s essentially a boiled down explanation of flashbacks and clever methods of exposition. They have their own library of self written (student and faculty) examples. Must save them money.

For a perfect example of “story within a story,” read Good OMens, by Terry Prachett and Neil Gaiman. Understand that this technique allows you to not only reach your word count, but further define the cosmology of your world and your narrator’s voice, easily and without much fuss.

Campbell worked as a story consultant for George Lucas. He died in the mid/late 80’s, just about the time “Return of the Jedi” was being written. Prior to that, of course, Star Wars: A New Hope is a textbook example of the Heroic Cycle (no thanks to George Lucas, who might be a brilliant film-MAKER, isn’t a top notch writer*).

Looking at the original trilogy in a larger sense, A New Hope, The Empire Strikes Back and ever Return of the Jedi mark out a perfect three act structure, with the end of “Empire” being the “all is lost moment.” Vogler’s work by implication suggests that writers lack the natural and fundamental ability to tell a story, something inherent in all humans (it is memory and language, the combination of the two that make STORY – that make us human).

I was recently introduced to Christopher Vogler’s interpretation of Campbell’s work. I’m sure Vogler had the best of intentions when he set out on his quest to simplify something that’s not really simple, but I have to question his results.

I’ve seen hundreds of “whatever book for writers” and their simplicity and lack of originality shock me in nearly every instance. Vogler suggests that he “takes the [heroic cycle concept] out of the academic language” and makes it more accessible. ??Simplifying story-telling results in books and movies like “The DaVinci Code” and “Avatar;” Wildly popular, dreadfully predictable and ultimately poor examples of the writer’s craft. (Come on! You were thinking it in Avatar when you heard the word “Unobtanium” – you know you were!)

Further, I take issue with the idea that story can be reduced to a series of dots on a line. While I understand that structure is actually a side effect of the need for language to describe pieces of story (we do the same with art), I feel that structure as it’s being taught tends to become a crutch for the less inspired writer’s of the world.

As writers, if we can’t be bothered to study our classic literature, to analyze Homer and Sophocles (the world’s first depressed and moody artist) and to dig deep into the origins of myth and story telling, then perhaps we’re in the wrong line of work.

*Sorry George. You were the reason I went to film school. But those last three Star Wars films were pretty rough. People don’t always say what they feel. Is there such a thing as travel time in your universe? Anakin was a failure as a literary character because we didn’t care about his fall from grace. He was always tainted. That was un-epic.

The occasional birdsong was replaced by a symphony; the teasing of insects became a chainsaw buzzing. By midsummer, the world was once again alive. The heat, a charming novelty at first, soon became oppressive, the thick humid winds were a sweltering lash.

Thunder brought the devil and rain that was hard, like nails. The earth itself would shake as the massive cotton-bruises lit and pulsed with electricity. Slowly they cruised across the landscape, driving us before them with their lashing winds and steely rain.

In space, summer doesn’t matter. August, June? We can’t tell. The ship is trying to keep us at a cool seventy degrees. The air is stale and dry, hot from the ever-present energy bleed of the reactors. The ship, our new world, the reactor, a sun and geothermal heat-source in one hard, slick shell.

I stay away from the windows.

Anyhow, here it is…Space Whales via Aviator interactive magazine!

Tell them how much you loved my story here!

In the past, I’ve seen businesses of all sizes ponder and waffle over the idea of a blog. The concerns are valid of course. You’re better off not having a blog if you’re not comfortable with writing, or if you can’t afford to hire a specialist. A poorly written blog will not only hinder your SEO opportunities, but will affect the credibility of your online presence and even damage your brand. Further, with larger organizations, timing becomes a factor. Most large corporations, even those with finely honed communications teams (ahem)are simply not agile enough to make good use of daily blogging efforts (let alone real-time feeds like Twitter of Facebook). Since corporate communications are ultimately beholden to the “brand image” that a battery of nameless executive want to create/project/manage, the timeliness and impact of real-time communications is blunted significantly.

The small business has an advantage when it comes to communications with clients and customers. The layers of bureaucracy are removed and the blog author can look the owner in the eye and help prepare the message.

That said, blogs must be used wisely. The internet grants the power of communication to all who dare take up the pen (or keyboard). The power must be used concisely and honestly. But refrain from bashing your opponents or competition out right. Comparisons and analyses are obviously the more mature and effective method to employ if you feel compelled to fence with your opponent.

Libel is the written defamation of a person or entity (oddly, corporations have the same rights as a human being in the United States – who’da thunk?). In my humble opinion, a good juicy blog rides the line of libel and slander, like a surfer stuck in the tube of truth knowing that he’s going to have to “jump the shark” before the episode is over.

Of course, that’s got nothing to do with any sort of professional or corporate/product blog. Remember, blogging is a straight dialogue between you and your customers and clients. It’s a chance to build your brand, but don’t get hung up on those BS marketing terms. Your blog is essentially a calling card, a first impression, a reference point and a lifeline for you and your customers. Think out your blog updates. Take the time make them consistent and relevant. Don’t just cut and paste your brochure garbage. Give it some personality – make it real, make the human connection.

One last tip – answer all the comments you get. It’s worth your time to show your customers and clients that you care about their thoughts and opinions. Your blog generates goodwill by being entertaining and useful.

The technology one uses to implement their online presence, brilliant flash-driven database apps, rusty-gear cranking CGI or smooth DHTML layers is really irrelevant when compared to the content being delivered.

Consider some of the most popular, or at least, oft visited websites: Youtube.com and Amazon.com. Youtube.com specializes in delivering video content. That’s all. Sure, there’s built in methods for sharing videos amongst your Facebook and MySpace buddies, but for the most part, Youtube.com just delivers videos. Nothing too complex about the layout, nothing too magical about the interface. Just videos.

Amazon.com on the other hand uses a rather old school display layout, plugged with little media apps here and there. Amazon’s magic, however, still lies in content delivery – its ability to parse through previous customer purchases and selections enabling it to display content that you are interested in.

Of course, the average small business doesn’t have the ad power or the draw that super-shopping sites or the delicate art of the human spectacle might have. But well planned, well thought out content is still the biggest draw available. Not only does well planned content have meaning for the audience, but it helps build long term SEO.

She pulled a hit from the swirled-glass creation, the acrid chemical smoke drifting lazily from her upper lip, curling around, obscuring a tiny mole before sneaking into her nostril to run through her pulmonary system again. Each pass the smoke grew weaker, thinner, as her body absorbed it instead of precious air.  Eyes half open, once pale-blue now blazed a noxious red. Her ears rang.

It was a painful need, that nagging desire always in the back of her mind, always chewing away at her dreams and goals, a dull blade knocking chips, spark and all, from so fragile self-respect.

As the pain receded and she slunk back into the warm arms of Forget, she was betrayed by her eyes and a tear fell.

My crackpipe has grown, transformed over the years, from simple knowledge to data to rampant seething, patterns. The crack pipe shattered and shivered when knowledge wasn’t enough. The patterns began to go wild, expanding and growing growing like interlaced vines. A fractal that cannot be mastered, cannot be wholly viewed in instant. As she wished for the pattern, I wished for the smoke.

How many of you have seen the recent film “Role Models?” (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0430922/) You’ll notice it had five writers working on the script. In film lingo, “and” means the two worked together on the project. The “ & “ means the second person re-wrote the script. When you see something like this:

…it means the script was written by a committee and is likely to suck since we all know that a group of people can’t really do anything. Don’t believe me? Have three people order a pizza and try to get everyone what they want. It doesn’t work. Someone will have to give.

I digress.

What follows is an excerpt from a story I wrote in early (February) 2006, for my final “Fiction Seminar” course, my senior year of my undergraduate program.

“Morning, I slow-drift into the Starbucks on the corner. Despite everything I know about Starbucks, it still means only one thing to me: coffee.

The sights and sounds are all alien to me, but I can smell coffee. I do not like coffee, but I need it. Entering the place, I find tall men, in black wool coats, scarves and newspapers. They drink things, the mill about. Women, hawk faces with too much make-up, too much perfume, like some sort of poisonous flower. So oddly attractive, you are drawn to it, and when you touch it or breath it in, the trap is sprung. The thick pollen sets in your innards and festers. You’ll never be free of it.

There is a line and a woman-girl in a Starbucks uniform takes my order well before I get to the register. Efficiency. Blinking the tentacles of Chanel from my eyes, I turn and reply.

“Medium coffee please.”

Moments later I’m at the register. A boy-man stares at me. “You had the venti?”

“What? I don’t speak latin.”

“What?” He stares.

“Venti. Sounds latin. I guess it could be Spanish. I could probably speak Spanish.”

He looks at me.

“What, Sir?”

“You know, Spanish? I could probably speak it. Like, hola, gracias, su casa es me banyo, that sorta shit.”

“Sir, did you order a venti coffee?”

“I ordered a medium coffee.”

“That’s what venti means.”

“No it doesn’t. I lied to you before. I speak a little Latin. Venti means to come. I doubt it means medium in Spanish either.” He stared. I went on.

“Come to think of it, medium means medium in Latin. At least, medi, medius, mediam.”

Behind me, a voice. “What hell is your problem buddy?”

I turn to face a tall man in a black wool long coat. He looks, funny to me, so I half smile.

“My problem is that this kid is making up words. And I’m dying.”

I put three dollars on the counter, grab my medium coffee and leave.”

The story was submitted to the instructor, Antonia Rose Logue, and shared with ten other students for their review and critique. I also published the original version of the story on LiveJournal (Feb. 6th, 2006 at 2:38 PM). Considering the copies that were made and distributed for the class, there is no end to possibilities of who saw the original story.

Watch the film “Role-Models.”

Tell me, then, honestly, if they stole my scene. Then, tell me what I can do about it…

This story picks up with a Commissar-Colonel Gaunt wondering just how soft he’s gotten. One is reminded of the opening scenes of Apocalypse Now, where Martin Sheen stares out of his window wondering he’ll get orders to leave Saigon.

Gaunt’s Ghosts are no different than any other combat veteran, an entire regiment of soldiery so tuned up and keyed to self=preservation through violence, it’s no wonder that the Ghost’s run astray.

The novel opens with a gruesome scene wherein the infiltration of the Sabbat Crusade’s HQ world is cleverly explained. I won’t give too much more detail for fear of spoiling a fun read.

I did note, however, that it was page 67 before I felt the old interest, that Abnett page-turning, pulse-pounding sci-fi pulp action returning. Aside from the Blood Pact infiltration, I honestly can’t remember what happened in those first 67 pages.

As a long time Gaunt’s Ghosts fan, I think my patience for their antics is higher than would be for a new reader. I also found myself reflecting on the characters, it feels as if most of the original Ghosts are gone now. The replacement characters have yet to become fully endeared to me and I wonder, how will this regiment end up?

Gaunt’s capture and torture in the last book were cleanly glossed over, and any residual trauma he may have had has yet to make itself known…